Go Back And Change!

photo via xjy

1. Fur-lined, hooded parkas
2. Fur-lined boots
3. Skirts
4. Fake tan

Somebody please explain this to me.

photo via kjdm

I don’t have anything against pink, really. Or against hair accessories. Or even against pink hair accessories. What I do have a problem with is spending $30 dollars on something that’s been pulled out of a peacock’s ass and glued to a barrette.

photo via Max Chernitsov

I hope you won’t be cross with me for posting this semi-professional photo. I was minding my own business in a flickr stream when these underpants attacked my vision, and now the simple pair of panties I was going to feature (They had ‘BITE ME’ written on the butt. In Comic Sans.) seems so frighteningly acceptable that I can even imagine walking past them in the tighty-whiteys aisle at Costco.

Nevertheless, I love you, Russia. You are the land of my birth and home to a people who have an endearing habit of combining leopard print, gaudy jewelry and skintight white leather with pink tassels into one outfit. But please, please put some pants back on.

…

EDIT: The more I look at this, the more that thing around his shoulders looks like a moustache. Ugh.

photo via intertrademall

“The Magic Scarf is an ingenious Italian design of feathery acrylic yarn fashioned into an open ended tube. … Can be used as Neck Scarf ~ Wrap ~ Tube Scarf ~ Muffler ~ Shawl ~ Cowl etc.”

According to Wikipedia (and my Latin dictionary, which I left at home today), the word cowl comes from the Latin cuculla, meaning “effing ugly.” In late Latin, it was frequently translated as “hideous neck worm,” which any scholar of the Bible knows was the Plague of Egypt that came after incurable boils. Ugh.